Coach vs Mentor vs Consultant - What Are We?
What is in a name? Why does it matter what we call ourselves? If you've been watching Brené Brown's recent series on HBO like we have, then you know that language matters. and defining things appropriately goes a long way in expression and understanding. And, if you know Maurice, you know he loves a good definition and the actual meaning of a word. So allow us to define a few terms we often see floating around the online space and also share what they mean to us.
Defining Coach
Probably one of the most prolific titles in the online space is "coach" -- everything from life coach, to food coach, to business coach, and beyond. But what does it mean to be a coach? When we look at the "sport" version of it (because we're sports junkies over here), it is to "train or instruct." When we look at the education version of the definition, it is to "give extra or private teaching" (Oxford Languages). Wikipedia defines "coaching" as a "form of development in which an experienced person, called a coach, supports a learner or client in achieving a specific personal or professional goal by providing training and guidance."
But what this actually means in practice is that anyone who self-identifies as an "experienced person" can support the learning of another person. It's an unregulated field, with no agreed upon benchmarks or standards, and therefore no barrier to entry. Which can be both beautiful AND problematic. We all are experienced persons in something and really it only requires the confidence to say "I could coach someone how to do this" to actually emerge into the coaching industry.As a result, the public has been introduced to an onslaught of "coaches" with no real way to evaluate or test their effectiveness.
Our Experience with Coaching
When we first arrived in the online landscape, "coach" felt like the proper label to apply to ourselves. Though we had a track record of success, none of it was public. We knew we'd have to prove ourselves and any other more formiddable title just didn't seem to make sense. But we quickly realized that we weren't coaches. Because our experience with coaches was that they had a singular way of approaching a problem, or a singular framework they taught... and they were often ALL UP IN YA BUSINESS.
One thing we knew about ourselves, regardless of title: we did not have the time or desire to be INSIDE someone else's business. We do not have the capacity to hold space for the problems or concerns of another person's business, we have 3 of our own.
...and so we started looking for a new title. We landed on mentor.
Defining Mentor
The reason we chose mentor is because of the feeling we got when we thought about those in our lives who we bestowed the title on. People who challenged us to question our thoughts or beliefs about something, who encouraged us to follow our hearts instead of our heads, who showed us a way when we didn't always see one for ourselves. And THAT was the type of leadership and support we wanted to provide to others. It WAS the leadership and support we were providing to others. And when we looked at the definition, "an experienced and trusted advisor" (Oxford Languages), we knew that mentor was a much title for the work we do.
We identify individualized solutions for solving problems. We want to listen and understand to the business owner, then advise based on our knowledge and experience. We want to equip the entrepreneur with tools to be successful beyond us, in hopes they outgrow us (we truly want that). And the word mentor is better aligned with the bandwidth we have available in our work with other businesses.
...and then came a corporate client. Here, the word "mentor" didn't really apply.
Defining Consultant
As a result, we started looking for an additional descriptor that could convey the high level strategy we were able to bring. This includes elements of done-for-you work, but still without living inside the business of another company. When we looked up consultant, it was basically the "professional" version of mentor, specifically "a person who provides expert advice professionally" (Oxford Language) and BOOM it stuck. We still primarily reserve this title for when we are working with corporate clients, because it feels more appopriate in that setting; Whereas mentor feels more appropriate in the online space and when working with individual business owners.
Our experience has shown us that it is okay to shift our identity once we realize our initial pursuit isn't a good fit. Just like in our businesses, pivoting is an important skill. At the end of the day, what we call ourselves matters. This is both to serve the perception of others and to serve ourselves in how it makes us feel.
